Grief Encounters Podcast - with Karen Docherty and Fiona Tuomey
Grief Encounters is a weekly podcast hosted by Venetia Quick and Sasha Hamrogue, where they discuss grief, something that affects everyone one of us and yet is still so difficult to talk about. They aim to open the conversation surrounding grief and create a safe space for people to talk about their losses and own experiences. We want to highlight two episodes that are specifically about suicide-related grief.
On the episode Suicide and Guilt, they talk to Karen Docherty who lost two of her sons to suicide. She talks openly and candidly about her feelings, the stigma around suicide, how she dealt with her losses and more.
Karen starts off her episode by talking about her sons and their stories and addresses the fact that suicide is the biggest cause of death amongst men under 50 and that we need to be doing more to end the stigma around mental health, particularly when it comes to men. She talks about how her losses have allowed her to better understand mental health and the importance of talking and reaching out.
Karen faced difficulties when seeking help after her sons took their own lives and she believes that more needs to be done by the government to provide resources and support for mental health awareness and for those who are suicidal. She tells Venetia and Sasha how she turned to online communities and that she found support from people who were going through similar things on Facebook, which emphasises the significance of connecting with others. Karen opens up about dealing with anniversaries and how to make happy memories during these hard times. She discusses how this time can be extremely hard and anxiety-inducing and so turning it into nice memories by doing things her sons loved has helped her cope.
Grief Encounters also features another episode that addresses suicide loss called Surviving a Suicide with Fiona Tuomey. Fiona lost her daughter to suicide in 2016 and since then Fiona has done a lot of work with mental health services and is aiming for changes within the Irish health system.
Fiona lost her daughter Milly when she was 11 years old. She talks about the overwhelming and terrifying feelings that can come with suicide bereavement but the motivation that it has given her to work towards ‘fixing the system in Ireland when it comes to mental health’. Fiona discusses the lack of resources she found when trying to get help for Milly, including long wait times and not enough services provided. She goes into detail about how hard it is to lose a child to suicide and how a lot of people cannot understand what she is going through, including professionals. Since Milly’s death, Fiona searched for a suicide bereavement support group in Dublin but failed to find one and so in 2017, Fiona established HUGG. HUGG is a peer support organisation in Ireland which aims to create a safe and comfortable environment where those bereaved by suicide can open up about their experiences and feelings whilst gaining support from others.
Both episodes are very honest and provide an insight into suicide bereavement.