Submission 76

To my darling Mike,

I think every day about what I would say if I could speak to you one last time. The truth is there really is so much to tell you.

I have moments where i feel so angry at the situation I’ve been left with, the difficulties I face daily and the utter heart ache I feel every morning when the realisation hits me over and over again.

The children miss you in abundance, you’ve left such a hole in their lives. I try my hardest to fill your boots but they are very large boots to fill.

I know now that you did this because you felt we would be better off without you but we are not and we never will be Mike.

I wish I could let you know somehow that we would give anything for you to be back here. To see you pull up on the drive and walk through the door.

I hope you know that I’m not angry with you, I know that in your right mind you wouldn’t of left us intentionally, but I’m angry with depression! When people ask me how you died I tell them depression much the same as you would blame another terminal illness.

All this said I will end with this, I love you with my whole heart and I always will xxxxxxxxx

Until we meet again my love.

Your Amber xxxx